


Favorites

by PrinceofBadassery



Category: Captain America (Movies), Iron Man (Movies)
Genre: Bucky Barnes Needs a Hug, Gen, M/M, Not Canon Compliant, Pre-Relationship, Talk about trauma, Tony Stark Is a Good Bro, lots of talk about coffee, lots of talk about notebooks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-13
Updated: 2018-04-10
Packaged: 2018-12-27 18:23:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 6,008
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12086748
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PrinceofBadassery/pseuds/PrinceofBadassery
Summary: "You're not the coffee type, are you?" Tony sat down across from Bucky cradling his mug with both hands, inhaling the tantalizing fumes greedily. Bucky's slight wince at his words didn't go unnoticed by Tony. "Something wrong?""I like coffee." Bucky mumbled, staring into his cup and not sounding the least bit convincing."Are you sure? Because your face says otherwise."---------Six months after being rescued from HYDRA Bucky thinks he should have figured things out by now, what he likes and doesn't like, especially with Steve telling him his favorites. It should have been easy.A lot of talk about coffee but it's not coffee that's the problem here.------I ADDED A SECOND PART! :D





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Tiny_Snark](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Tiny_Snark/gifts).



> For my friend Tiny_Snark, originally planned for last week when it would have been relevant.

First it was orange juice. Then coffee. Then grape juice, grapefruit juice, red berry juice, coffee again. Hot chocolate, milk, some weird protein shake and then coffee again. 

Every time Tony walked into the kitchen in the morning Bucky was sitting there staring into a different beverage. And the frown deepened every day. 

It was one of his "coffee days" as Tony called them; every couple of days Bucky would go back to drinking coffee in the morning. Tony didn't know if he tried different blends or what but the man didn't look happy about the brown delicious lovely liquid that Tony could inhale all day every day. 

"Hey, Grumpybear, coffee too bitter?" Tony grabbed his favorite extra-large cup and emptied the rest of the pot into it, filling it almost completely.

Bucky grumbled something and took a small sip then pulled a disgusted face. Now Tony was curious, the coffee smelled good, great even, he did invest a good amount of money into fair-trade coffee for this pleasure. After taking a sip himself Tony was convinced there was something wrong with the super soldier's taste buds. The coffee tasted divine. 

"You're not the coffee type, are you?" Tony sat down across from Bucky cradling his mug with both hands, inhaling the tantalizing fumes greedily. Bucky's slight wince at his words didn't go unnoticed by Tony. "Something wrong?" 

"I like coffee." Bucky mumbled, staring into his cup and not sounding the least bit convincing.

"Are you sure? Because your face says otherwise and this is at least the fifth time I've seen you drink or rather not drink coffee and it can't be the coffee because my coffee is good." Tony took a large gulp from his mug to proof his point. "So what's the deal? You've been trying all kind of things over the last weeks. If you want something specific to drink in the morning you just gotta ask."

Bucky stayed silent for a moment before pushing his cup of coffee away from him and crossing his arms on the table. He hung his head. "Steve said I like coffee." 

"Ah." Things clicked into place for Tony. "And now you don't and you're trying to get used to it." 

Bucky put his head into his hands but his pained expression didn't escape Tony. "I googled it, it's an 'acquired taste', whatever that means. Internet wasn't really clear on that. I figured, because I haven't had it in so long I lost the taste?" He shrugged. "I don't know... I don't know what I like. After HYDRA...everything is just gone. I remember a few things. Things I think I liked. Like pizza." Bucky dropped his hands again, his finger tips just shy of the coffee mug. "Everybody likes pizza though, so that's no help."

That must have been the most words Bucky had ever spoken to Tony since Steve dragged a kicking and screaming Winter Soldier to the tower several months ago. It had turned out the Winter Soldier's violent tendencies had mainly been due to the abundance of drugs in his system courtesy of HYDRA. The withdrawal period had been long and gruesome and had brought everybody to their limits, physically and mentally, but in the end what was left of the dangerous HYDRA puppet was a broken man with almost no memories and no place in the world. 

Now, months later, Bucky was able to live an almost normal life in the tower, rediscovering a little piece of himself every day. But while Tony had thrown as much money at both Bucky and Steve to help with the recovery, from providing basic necessities like clothing to a reinforced apartment with certain safety measures that Bucky himself had insisted on, Tony and Bucky hadn't really spent that much time together. 

"What's your favorite food, Tony?"

The question came unexpected but it only took Tony a few seconds to answer. "Cheese. Or does coffee count as a food, because then it would be coffee." Bucky nodded thoughtfully.

"What's your favorite color?"

"Red. Hot rod red to be exact, just in case the Iron Man suits weren't clear enough." 

"What's your favorite celebrity?"

"Besides me, you mean?" Tony sighed dramatically. "Robert Downey Jr. I think he stole my beard. No, actually I am certain he stole my beard."

Bucky didn't look like he appreciated Tony's attempt at humor, his brows furrowed as he stared at his hands. Tony's smile dropped from his face. "What's this about, Bucky?" He asked softly, feeling this was about more than just food preferences. As soon as Tony had uttered the words Bucky broke down, he dropped his head into his hands and a whole body shudder ran through him. 

"I can't answer any of that." Bucky answered after some ragged breaths. "I don't.. I don't know what my favorites are. I've been trying all these things the last weeks and I can't tell you what I like. Juice is just... juice, it's all the same to me and I fucking hate this stuff," he paused and pushed the coffee mug a couple of inches away with a single finger. "No matter how many times I try it, but Steve told me all the things I like and I just... it doesn't work. And it's not just the coffee...that's just the thing that started this all. You remember when you told me I could ask Jarvis to order some clothes for me, after I - you know - could form coherent thoughts again?" 

Tony remembered that. He had provided some basics like plain shirts and pants, underwear and such, but he had thought it would be a good idea to let Bucky pick out his own clothes to help him become his own person again.

Bucky glanced at Tony for a moment but lowered his head again before he answered. "I asked Jarvis to decide for me. He bought my entire wardrobe." 

That Tony hadn't known. He had just figured the muted colors and simple cuts were Bucky's thing, he should have known that it was really Jarvis' taste, he had programmed the AI after all.

"Or when you all order food and I just get whatever Steve gets? It's so fucked up. I'm so used to eating what's put in front of me, wearing what's given to me...I can't do anything else. Even deciding what to try for breakfast was horror until I just took whatever I saw first in the fridge!"

Bucky dropped his head onto the counter with a loud bang and bunched his hair in his fists, in his right fist at least. It seemed like Bucky was aware enough not to tangle his hair in between the metal plates of his left hand, that had to be painful.

"Fuck, fuck, fuck, I don't know what got over me, now I am rambling to you and you got better things to do than listen to my whining and fuck. Please don't throw me out." 

"What?" That was the last thing on Tony's mind right now, if anything he felt an inherent need to fix this. How had he not noticed that Bucky was suffering under his care? The guy had been living in his tower for almost half a year now, right under his nose. He had thought that Steve was more than capable of taking care of his best friend. Relying on the only person able to provide some information about Bucky's former life had sounded like the best strategy for helping the amnesiac. In theory at least. He should have noticed things weren't going as great as they seemed.

"I swear, I didn't meant to bother you, I just - you were there and asked and urgh. I'm sorry, I'll go now." With that Bucky shuffled back, keeping his head down, which meant Tony really only saw a mass of hair moving backwards from the table. Thinking fast he reached out and held Bucky's hand - the right one - gently before the other could get away.

Bucky went rigid immediately, but Tony didn't let go, instead only loosened his grip if Bucky wanted to pull away, he could do so easily. He didn't and after only a second Bucky looked up. Grey eyes full of confusion, lips slightly parted as if to protest.

"Not going to throw you out, Bucky." Tony said gently, rubbing his thumb over the back of Bucky's hand. "And as you said, I asked what's going on, why would I be mad if you then answered, huh?" He watched as Bucky averted his eyes, his expression changing to sorrowful. "Have you told Steve about this?"

"Told Steve what? That I'm fucked up beyond repair? That I can't even get one thing right to be like the Bucky he knew?" 

Oh boy, Tony didn't even know where to start here, but Bucky made that choice for him when he reached forward with his left hand - Tony was still holding the right - and grabbed the coffee mug so forcefully Tony could already see the dark liquid splattering everywhere. 

"I'm so fucked up, it can't be this hard to like this." Bucky lifted the mug and Tony knew what he wanted to do; he put his hand over the opening before Bucky got any further.

"You don't have to do that." Tony exerted light pressure to the mug and although Bucky could have easily countered it - with his metal arm especially - he didn't and the mug touched the counter again. Bucky looked utterly forlorn, like Tony had just taken away his last hope.

"Bucky, you don't have to make yourself like coffee just because Steve said you used to like it. Everybody's taste changes, there's nothing wrong with that." With every other person Tony would have probably launched into a rant about how amazing coffee is and how dare they not like it, but this wasn't the time nor place and while Bucky had never shown any signs of violence towards any of the Avengers, Tony wasn't about to cause a full blown break down because of a quip that was on the tip of his tongue. He had learned that much from living with a bunch of traumatized super people.

Bucky was teetering on the edge of one, trembles were running through his body and while Tony couldn't see them, he could definitely feel Bucky's hand shake underneath his. "You don't have to be the Bucky Steve tells you about." And that was the wrong thing to say because Bucky sucked in a sharp breath.

"Who am I supposed to be then? If not Bucky?" Bucky's voice was barely more than a whisper.

"Bucky 2.0!" Tony blurted out, his technical brain providing an automatic answer.

"What?"

"Bucky 2.0, a new version of Bucky, you know, like with program- " Unfortunate word choice, Tony realized and back-pedaled. "Or like my Iron Man suits!" 

Confusion mixed into Bucky's horrified expression and Tony counted that as a positive sign so he continued. "I've build over 50 suits, give or take. I made some adjustments here, improvements there, scrapped the whole thing a few times but from the original one to the one I currently use, they're all Iron Man suits. The suit is in a constant state of development, there is no suit that is /the/ Iron Man suit." 

Bucky's face remained unchanged.

"Thing is, you don't have to be /the/ Bucky from the forties, that hung out with future Captain America when he was still a puny kid. Hell, I doubt you were even that guy anymore when you first set foot on the battlefield in the war. People change, Sunshine, and that's okay." Tony didn't have to reiterate how much Bucky had gone through during his time with HYDRA, he doubted many people would have survived the ordeal, let alone came out of it as good a shape as Bucky was. 

"I'm not the same person I was five years ago, and I tell you what." Tony gave Bucky's hand a slight squeeze. "Steve isn't the same person he was back then either."

Something clicked in Bucky and his face softened, the tension seeped out of him like a long held breath. His shoulders relaxed, a few strands of hair fell into his face. Gently Tony pried the coffee mug out of his metal fingers without any resistance. 

"No more of this." 

Bucky nodded softly, but Tony knew something bothered him still.

"Why don't I like it though?" Bucky eventually admitted, sounding defeated. 

"I can't give you the answer to that, Bucky, I can think of a lot of possible reasons though." The other man looked up at that and Tony continued. "First possibility? You never liked it to begin with." 

"But -" 

"I know, Steve said it, but Steve can't see inside your head, maybe you did drink a lot of coffee, doesn't mean you liked it back then. Maybe it was the only thing available, maybe you drank it because everybody drank it, maybe you drank it because of the caffeine. Maybe this coffee tastes different from the coffee you used to drink and your taste buds have some kind of muscle memory and are not okay with that, and by the way, if that is the case, let me tell you I am offended at your taste buds being offended, because this coffee is /my/ jam." Tony took the abandoned coffee cup, took a sip and then couldn't stop himself from gulping down the whole thing. "Oh fuck me, even cold this stuff is good." 

A tiny smile appeared on Bucky's face as he watched Tony.

"And another thing, you tried it black, maybe you drank it with sugar, maybe with milk, maybe with both." Tony shrugged. "And that's just covering the fact that you might have gotten used to it and drunk it a lot, maybe even liked it and then your taste just changed. But that's not what your are worried about, is it?" 

Their hands were still touching and Tony could feel the other tense. 

"You're worried it was HYDRA. You're worried that you might not be able to like anything anymore, right?" 

Tony knew he had hit the problem head on when Bucky's face lost all color and he looked away, his hair falling into his face as he nodded. Tony's heart broke for the guy. "I don't think you have to worry about that." He continued before Bucky slipped back into break down territory.

"What?" 

"You like pizza," Tony pointed out, "and you - and I quote - 'fucking hate this stuff'." He wriggled the empty coffee cup for emphasis. "That shows you have some preferences and I'm sure with time you know exactly what you like and what not and then you can pick out your own clothes and order what you like off a menu, and best of all, you can get angry when someone drinks your favorite breakfast juice or something." 

"But I've tried so many things already and I just don't know..."

"Sunshine, six months ago you still had HYDRA fucking up your brain. And it's even less than that since you were able to make your own decisions. You're basically still a toddler - don't grimace - in terms of forming opinions. It takes time. Hell, I'm 44 and I still don't know if I like bubble tea or if it's the worst abomination the drink industry came up with to this day and that stuff came out 3 years ago." 

Bucky relaxed somewhat after that but he still didn't look up, so Tony gave his hand a squeeze and ever so slowly pushed Bucky's hair to the side, moving himself into Bucky's field of vision. "You know what toddlers do?" He asked, grinning.

Grumpily Bucky mumbled a 'what?'.

"They put stuff in their mouths." Tony said still grinning and waited until Bucky was done rolling his eyes. "I'd suggest you start doing the same, food stuff that is." 

"You know I am almost 100 years old, right?" Bucky huffed and then there was that tiny smile again. 

Tony got up and stretched a little. "I know, and you've got the whole world to discover. So let's start, shall we?" He went to the fridge and started grabbing everything juice related, which there was a lot for some reason, someone on the team was on a health trip it seemed. 

"We?" Bucky perked up and looked pretty amused while Tony struggled to shoulder the fridge closed again. 

"Yeah, unless you mind the company?"

"Not at all, I'll get the glasses."


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks to all the amazing feedback I got inspired to do another part. I hope you all enjoy!

Things with Bucky have been going great. The former assassin has started to open up to Tony and he had sought out Tony's presence regularly on his quest of finding out his favorites.

The first time Tony had been in his lab when JARVIS had announced that Bucky was standing in front of the door with a tray full of soup bowls in his hands. He hesitantly had walked in when Tony opened the door and had asked if he could stay while he tried out different instant ramen.

Tony was only too happy to agree and so Bucky had settled at an empty workbench and had slurped his noodle soups and scribbled notes on some spare paper. After that Bucky had shown up all the time when he found something he wanted to try out and Tony dedicated a spare table for him so he could keep his notes there. Bucky also started asking Tony questions about what he liked and wrote that down as well.

Steve started to get worried about his friend when he noticed Bucky being more distant from him. Tony figured the final straw was one day when they were ordering food and Steve out of habit ordered two of his choice - one for himself and one for Bucky - and Bucky stopped him.

"But you always take what I take." Steve had said, looking like a puppy who just lost his favorite toy.

"I want...," Bucky had started slowly, still very unsure that particular formulation. "I want something else."

Everybody at the table had stared at him. Tony had struggled to keep a neutral face but on the inside, he had been beaming with pride.

"I want what Tony ordered." Bucky had said decidedly and had looked Steve right in the eyes.

Steve immediately looked at Tony, suspicion and a very large dose of 'how dare you' evident in his stare, but Tony just shrugged. That had been Bucky's decision alone. Tony was so proud of him even when it turned out that Bucky didn't particularly like the dish afterward, he had chosen for himself that time and that was what counted. 

On other days when they had ordered in Bucky had decided to try some dishes that the other Avengers liked.

Tony found Bucky sitting at the desk in Tony's lab one day, shuffling through the piles of scrap paper that were his notes, he tried to get them into some sort of order and scribbled more onto some, scratched out other things. It was a mess.

"I think we need to go shopping, snowflake," Tony said and hopped onto the desk, letting his feet dangle. Bucky looked up at him confused, he was holding his pen between his lips and had smeared some ink onto his cheek. It looked too cute.

"This-," Tony gestured to all of the mess on the desk, "- is not good. I know you like using paper, you archaic snowman, but there are better ways then ...this. Let's go shopping."

Bucky slowly took the pen out of his mouth and surveyed the pile of papers in front of him. "Alright." He said and Tony fist pumped.

"Get a jacket, we're going now!"

\----

Half an hour later they were in front of a stationery shop. They were already drawing a crowd just standing there because Tony Stark, fancy suit and tinted sunglasses, and the Winter Soldier to a lesser extent in a hoodie, jeans and sneakers and very obviously not as well groomed as Tony. They were a very uneven pair.

"What is this place?" Bucky asked confused and Tony patted him on the shoulder.

"This is where you are going to choose a notebook. Or two. Or more. How many you like and maybe a fancy pen or some colored markers, whatever you like so you can get your thoughts in order more easily."

Bucky shuffled from foot to foot, hands deep in his hoodie pockets. "Alright..."

"But?" Tony asked, noticing Bucky's hesitation.

"What about the people?" Bucky hunched his shoulder and looked around at the drove of people on either side of the sidewalk. They were filming and taking selfies, but most didn't dare come closer than a few meters.

"Let me handle that, don't worry. Go ahead, I'll follow." Tony gently stirred Bucky towards the door, opened it for him and then pushed him inside before turning around, putting on his patented Stark smile and waved at the crowds. It took about 10 minutes before the crowd dissipated and the normal New York City street air of disinterest took over again.

Tony found Bucky standing in the notebooks section with a very confused look on his face, he was picking at the plates of his left hand, something he only did when he was very nervous. There were a lot of notebooks. A lot. Sizes, colors, lines or checkered, ring binding or glued, notebooks for different purposes, etc. Tony knew this would be really difficult for Bucky but he was prepared to stay as long as needed. "Take your time, Sunshine."

"I don't even know where to start. Why are there so many? Who needs this many notebooks?", Bucky whined and bunched his hair between his fingers. "This is too much, Tony, can you just pick one for me?" He looked pleadingly at Tony.

"Hey now. Don't give up so easily. I'll help you." Tony assured him. He took off his sunglasses and pocketed them then wrapped an arm around Bucky's shoulder, rather awkwardly as the man was a bit too tall to comfortably do that, but Bucky leaned a little towards Tony and eased the strain on his arm. "We'll start with a few easy questions."

"Questions?"

"Yeah, like, what size do you want? Just focus on the size for now."

Bucky's gaze wandered over the displays for a while. "I guess I would want something I can carry around easily. So nothing too big?"

"Good, then you can ignore all the big ones. What about these tiny ones?" Tony pointed to a display with colorful small notebooks the size of a credit card.

Bucky shook his head. "No, I can't put lists in these, the pages are too small."

"What size would fit your lists the best then?"

Bucky stepped out of Tony's embrace and let his hand trail over the notebooks in front of him, he then picked up a midsize notebook from the B5 shelf. He opened it up and flipped through the pages for a while. "This would be good. It's a bit smaller than the papers I used. Do you think this is okay?" Bucky turned to Tony holding the book out to him.

"Sunshine, you have to decide that, but that size is pretty standard and used for a lot of things."

Bucky nodded and picked up another one the same size, opening it up as well. This one had checkered pages while the other had lines and Bucky froze his eyes wandering from one to the other and back. "They're different on the inside too? Why? No no no no." He closed both of them with a snap and shoved them back into the shelf. "I can't do this. It's too much." He turned his back to the shelf and wrapped his arms around himself. He looked extremely miserable, he had his eyes squeezed closed, his hair was hanging in his face. Bucky was radiating misery with every pore and Tony started to doubt if the whole thing had been a bad idea after all. 

Tony stepped closer again and put a hand on Bucky's right arm. "You're doing great though. You already excluded a lot of the books by size and now we take the next step." He mumbled a few encouragements until Bucky relaxed again. "Come on, I know you can do it, you did all the deciding with the foodstuff over the last weeks."

"That's different. That's just tasting mostly, it's easier, but here... there are so many colors and there's some with lines and some with squares...," Bucky shook his head. "I can't process all of this, what if I choose wrong?"

"Bucky, there is no right or wrong." Tony tried one last time to lighten Bucky's mood before he would call it quits for today and take him home again to try again another time. "Even if you choose something and you later realize you don't like it, it's not wrong. There's no failure here, just you learning your preferences, and finding out what you don't like is part of that."

Bucky lifted his head at that, looking a little more hopeful.

"And I tell you what, Buckeroo, there are only three possibilities for the inside, lines, checkered and blank, that's easy enough, right?" Tony gently grabbed Bucky by the shoulders and turned him around. Bucky offered no resistance and didn't turn away again when Tony let go.

He quickly grabbed one of each notebook type and opened them up for Bucky. "Now, which one do you find the most appealing to write in?"

Bucky frowned and bit the inside of his cheek. Tony could almost see the gears turning in his head.

"Steve uses blank notebooks for drawing and I've used blank papers so far for my notes," Bucky said slowly.

"You like the blank one best then?"

Bucky shook his head. "No, it's always a hassle to keep the lists neat. I don't want a blank one." He said determinedly and Tony grinned at him.

"Another decision made, see, not that hard."

"It was hard," Bucky huffed, but he smiled nevertheless. Tony held up the last two notebooks for him and Bucky scrunched up his face in concentration again. He stared at them for a long time and Tony's arms almost gave out when Bucky finally pointed to the one with lines. "That one."

Relieved Tony put the checkered one away and stretched his arms. He checked his watch and realized they have been in the store for almost an hour, but he had geared himself up for a long process and he considered it a success that Bucky hadn't given up yet.

 

"Now what?" Bucky asked.

"Now you pick one of the middle-sized, lined notebooks. Any color or style you want."

Bucky looked around his gaze wandering over the shelves. "There's only like... a thousand different ones."

"Awwr, snowflake, come on, don't exaggerate. It's not that much and I think you can figure out pretty quick which ones you don't want. Do you like this stinky brown for instance?" Tony held up a plain leather notebook and Bucky quickly shook his head.

"I don't like leather." Bucky shuddered a little bit. "HYDRA dressed me too much in that stuff. Can't stand the smell."

"No leather bound ones then."

They continued like that, Tony holding up a notebook and Bucky thought about whether he liked it or not. Often he was not sure and Tony put them into an unsure pile.

At one point one of the employees came by and asked if everything was alright and Tony quickly assured her that they were just browsing and when she eyed Bucky suspiciously he promised to buy their most expensive pen for their trouble and that they wouldn't be disturbed anymore. Bucky promised to clean up the mess, which only seemed to disturb the employee even more.

In the end, they had two piles, ones with notebooks that Bucky had taken a liking too and one with books he was unsure about. It became clear that he liked the more vibrant colors and books that had cute characters on it. Every single notebook that featured an Avenger also landed on that pile too. They went through the piles a few more times until only a few were left, a dark red notebook bound in cloth that Bucky couldn't tell why he was so drawn to it. A simple black composition book and smaller notebook with a flip imagine of Iron Man on it that looked like Iron Man was flying across the New York City skyline. Tony was very flattered by Bucky's choice.

"I can't decide between these three. I like them all equally." Bucky said. They had both sat down on the floor some time ago and Bucky had the three notebooks lying in front of him. He was doing the typical thinker pose with his chin resting on his right fist, except he was pouting adorably while staring at the predicament in front of him.

"Then take them all," Tony suggested.

Bucky looked up. "I thought should pick one."

Tony shook his head. "I said you can pick one or as many as you like and if you like all three of these then we buy these three. Unless you want to think about it some more."

"What am I going to do with three notebooks. I only need one."

"I don't know. Either you keep them as back-ups or you think about a purpose for them. Is there something else you want to write down except your preference lists?"

Bucky made an unidentifiable noise and went back to staring at the books in front of him. Tony focused back on his tablet. He had done a few bits and bobs for his projects while Bucky had sat silently contemplating. They were going on three hours in the shop now, but Tony could see the light at the end of the tunnel. The employees had left them alone as well.

They quietly sat there for another ten minutes then Bucky suddenly clapped his hands together. "I think I got it now. I want all three." He said, beaming a big smile at Tony.

"Awesome, I'm so proud of you." Tony reached out and pulled Bucky's head closer, wrapping the other man in an awkward hug and ruffling his hair. Bucky was laughing and didn't protest to the manhandling. When Tony let go again Bucky looked up with disheveled hair, smiling happily.

"I am so exhausted now. I don't want to do any thinking for the next two days. Battling HYDRA for a week straight is nothing compared to his."

"But you did it! Come on, let's clean up this mess and pay and then we'll go back to the tower and order some Mexican food, what do you say?" Tony tried to get up but one of his legs had fallen asleep so he flopped back down. "If I can get up." He groaned.

Bucky was a little more successful and hopped to his feet then leaned down, grabbed Tony under the armpits and lifted him up effortlessly. Still unable to stand Tony clung to Bucky's shoulders for support. "Careful with this old man, Sunshine."

Bucky chuckled. "I'm technically older than you."

Tony waved him off, shaking is sleeping leg a little. Bucky stabilized him gently, holding him in his arms until Tony got the feeling back in his leg. Bucky's hands lingered on Tony a little while longer even when Tony was standing on his own and Tony wished they had stayed like that a little longer.

On the way to the register, Tony nudged Bucky in the side. "Are you going to tell me what you are going to use them for?"

To Tony's surprise, Bucky blushed and turned his head away. "For my notes, obviously, and maybe... I want to write down some of my memories." He said hesitantly.

"That's two, what's the third one for?" Tony prodded a little deeper, smirking. Bucky was too adorable.

"That's... that's it. That's all I want to do." Bucky lowered his head and let his hair fall in front of his face, but it couldn't hide the blush that was spreading further and further over his cheeks and neck. Bucky was also a very bad liar.

"That's good. A good plan, I like it." Tony patted Bucky's back.

Bucky put his notebooks on the table next to the register and Tony browsed the displays at the front of the store and picked up a few odds and sods. Avengers keychains, Avengers pencils and a pack of colorful markers. When it came to paying Tony held out his credit card and pointed to the display of fancy and expensive pens. "The Iron Man one, obviously."

"Of course, Mr. Stark." The woman behind the register was very kind and got the red and gold fountain pen out of the display then packed all their things into a bag and handed it to Bucky. "Have a nice day, Mr. Barnes."

The simple courtesy overwhelmed Bucky so much that he opened and closed his mouth a few times, staring at the woman, before he mumbled a quick "Thank you."

Back in the car, he cradled the bag against his chest like it was a precious treasure. He had a relaxed smile on his face as he watched the streets of New York City pass by the car window. It filled Tony's heart with warmth watching the man be so happy. He couldn't recall a time when Bucky had been this relaxed in the tower. There was always a certain wariness and tension surrounding him wherever he went but now he looked so peaceful and at ease, it was almost like he was... sleeping.

Bucky had fallen asleep.

He hadn't been kidding when he said he was exhausted.

\-----

In the next couple of days, Bucky happily scribbled away in his new red notebook. He carefully copied his notes from the scrap papers and made new lists, using the markers and pens Tony had bought for him. He would often show Tony his work and ask for suggestions of what else to add or to try out. Bucky took the book everywhere and showed it to anyone who asked. This ended in more than one discussion with Clint about the order in which Bucky had rated pizza toppings and Natasha remarked he couldn't just put vodka in a list without specifying which brand. Steve looked like a lost puppy at first watching his friend interact with people on his own accord but eventually he followed suit and supported Bucky in his endeavor.

The simple composition book also got used, but it was almost the polar opposite of the red book. Late at night Bucky would sit in the in the armchair in the corner of the common room and write in it. Tony had walked in on him one time but the look on Bucky's face had stopped him from starting any interaction. Bucky had looked so forlorn in his thoughts that Tony had backed up again and headed to the kitchen instead. While the red notebook was open for everyone to see the composition book was closely guarded. Bucky never left it lying around, the only times Tony saw it was when Bucky was actually writing in it but he was quick to snap it close and disappear from the room when someone came too close to him during those times.

The only notebook Tony didn't see ever was the Iron Man one. His reckoned Bucky kept it in his room but he could only guess as to what he wrote in it. He didn't know if Bucky used it at all what he wrote in it, it had to be something special if he kept it hidden so well.

Tony was dying of curiosity but JARVIS wouldn't snitch on him, saying his privacy protocols wouldn't allow it. That left Tony with frustrated guesses.

**Author's Note:**

> I could write so much more about Bucky forming opinions and I really had to hold myself back to not go into more details and this already turned out longer than I thought. Bucky recovering is my favorite topic.


End file.
